Sew kind

I love nice people so I decided to write a blog about one.  I’ve never even met this lady.

A little while ago Kelly my sister in law commissioned some handmade bears to give all the family as a surprise.  Not just any bears.  These bears were made from my late brothers clothing, his friends and family will recognise one of the patterns in particular.  I love mine.  He sits on the shelf in the living room and I always give him a quick glance.  Reilly loves him too and does occasionally lock him in our bird cage ornament,must be that one visit to the Zoo at the Lakes.

I think it’s a lovely craft and brings a lot of happiness to bereaved families.


The ladies name is Caroline Chapman and she appears on most streams of social media as Carrie’s Thread Bears.  Since receiving my bear I messaged Caroline to say thank you and stayed in touch ever since.  She loves Reilly’s blogs and I cheer her up with my John Rocha posts, he’s my twin. She is my biggest fan (I think I look like John Rocha and pretend I am in him in various photographs, you have to be there) for example …….

Bastard freezing and me flint’s knackered.

Anyway today I received a present through the post.  I love it, not just because I like gifts but it’s nice like receiving a written letter instead of a typed one.

Inside the package was this little beautiful tooth fairy cushion for when Reilly starts to lose his teeth.  You put the tooth in the little pocket for safe keeping while under the pillow and replace with a coin or whatever, good news for us parents is the pocket is small good for a pound coin and no fivers!

What a lovely gesture.  Even more lovely that I know she’s been unwell and is supporting her sister through chemo.  Absolute star and i’m super grateful. 

By the way how the hell do we explain losing teeth to our autistic cherubs?  New one for me to read up on I think.

Take a look at some of her great work you’ll be impressed xx






I made a thankyou video!!

This may put you off your lunch with my squeaky geordie tones and black eyes, what you see is what you get but felt like I needed to say thankyou and not just type it.

I cannot wait to get cracking and start writing about this experience and share it with you all.

The Life of Reilly and …………  ?

Much love to everybody



I do lots of work as part of NE Hearts with Goals with the Pinpoint Recruitment Football League.  After talking to Ian Coates about the campaign they have donated a massive £500 to compensate for the Go Fund Me fee and the travelling expenses we will incur on the several trips back and forward to Scotland.  I’m stunned and I’m crying. AGAIN.  





Gratitude and positivity

I cannot express how grateful I am to everyone who has donated and shared Reilly’s appeal for his autism support dog.  So many times I have been asked to start a crowdfunder when discussing a support dog in the past and I just haven’t been able to do it.  Is it pride? Nope I’m pretty shameless most of the time.

What is it about me that doesn’t feel worthy of peoples donations?  I have no problems whatsoever badgering people for donations for our charity but then again that isn’t for me. I literally cringe tweeting Reilly’s campaign to strangers I feel like Oliver Twist in the workhouse.

I’m a good person.  I do good things and christ knows karma has got lost looking for me to repay it.

The fact of the matter is I am absolutely blown away by the comments and emails I have received.  It has boosted my confidence and my self esteem the last 2 days.  I have been shown such gratitude just for writing this blog I feel I must repay it with a big fat right back at you!

Gratitude and positivity is everything. I’m a positive person.  I always try to make sure my cup is half full not half empty.

When I lost my brother years back it would have been too easy to wallow and sink, which I did for a while, I teetered on the edge of the black hole of depression dipping my toe in it every single day, I once fell in upto my neck for a good while but managed to claw my way back. I still dip my toe in everyday by the way. Not sure that will ever stop.

After Neil’s sudden death I clung to the fact that there had to be a reason, why a well respected, fit young man could just be taken in the blink of an eye it was unfathomable.  Had to be reason, why us?  32 years of age is nothing.

Years later we found that reason.  Had we not lost my brother we would never have found my nephew’s hidden heart condition and in that realization a little bit of bitterness and angriness was chipped away just a little bit.

Without Neil’s death we would not have established the charity NE Hearts with Goals.  3 families have been saved from the heartbreak and desperation of losing a loved one.  We turned a wretched experience into a positive one for others and ourselves.  The gratitude we are shown by helping people is priceless, it’s like a medicine that keeps the angry bits at bay.   Gratitude & positivity two of life’s great staples. Practice them both and great things can happen.  Throw in some mindfulness and we are really talking.

I’ve had a lovely snippet of long awaited positivity tonight when Reilly independently went and picked up 2 of his PECS signs for bed at 7’o clock at presented them to me with a yawn.  He’s trying so hard to communicate with us and I felt a little chink of negativity drop off my shoulder as I tiptoed back out the room when he fell asleep.  He’ll probably be back up at 2am.

I have my fingers crossed that one day the weight I carry on my shoulders will get lighter, I try really hard to make it that way.  I have a beautiful family and a roof over my head and for that I am truly grateful.

In other news I forgot to send cakes to school for Macmillan and didn’t send a donation.  I never fail! 

Big thankyou everybody and much love.  Let’s smash this target for Reilly (and me).

Go Fund Me for Reilly’s Autism Support Dog