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After a pretty much sleepless night last night I managed to tie myself in knots over our looming holiday.  After months of convincing I decided last year that I would be brave and try abroad with the family.  We chose a short flight with a short transfer which was 2 major ticks off my worry list.

We are off to Ibiza at the end of June and I am terrified!

I always get anxious being aware from home, it’s in my genes, it’s who I am but by god planning a holiday with Reilly is something else.

Reasons I don’t want to go:

  1. It’s easier at home (I have no proof of this yet 😂)
  2. Reilly doesn’t like seatbelts.
  3. I don’t know how he’ll cope with the airport or plane.
  4. What if there is no lock on my balcony door.
  5. What if the hotel door doesn’t have a lock on the inside.
  6. What if he wanders.
  7. He doesn’t like sun cream.
  8. He doesn’t like other people eating.
  9. He only eats beige things.
  10. What if he can’t sleep and wants to come home.  (This applies to me and him).
  11. I  hate planes.
  12. I’m too fat and have no clothes.

I could go on for hours covering reasons why we shouldn’t go.

Reasons we should go:

  1. Reilly and Ellis absolutely love the beach and the water.
  2. Ellis talks about nothing but going on holiday.
  3. We all need some Vitamin D on our skin.
  4. I really really really want to lie on a sun lounger with a book worry free for two hours.
  5. Reilly loves planes.
  6. I don’t want to cook for 11 days.
  7. I want nice food.
  8. I want to spend quality time with my boys.

So this is what I have done to try and make our holiday go as smooth as possible.

  • IPAD films, programmes, games downloaded.
  • I have played youtube videos of people boarding planes on a regular basis.
  • I have social stories for the journey. Airport Social Story
  • Small presents to be wrapped up in lots of cellotape and put in my bag for Reilly to open on flight if necessary (keep him busy – thankyou Tracey Smith).
  • Ear defenders purchased.
  • Airport emailed and form downloaded to assist us when we get there and boarding the plane last.  Newcastle Airport Autism Info
  • Purchasing a Crelling type harness to use in car and on plane.  No escape mate. Houdini standard.
  • Tracking device to be purchased to signal if Reilly wanders past 30 metres, falls in the water or is kidnapped ( I know but the fear is real).  Attaches to his clothes and links to my phone.
  • Full SPF swimsuit to be purchased and still testing different sun creams/sprays.
  • Plastic plate and bowl going in the case along with mini boxes of cereal.
  • Mam and Dad are coming as backup not just for us but to ensure Ellis doesn’t have a holiday of being restricted to Reilly’s wishes.
  • Hotel has been emailed with prior warning and my concerns about lock and things to climb on the balcony.
  • Asking my doctor for diazepam to actually get myself on the flight.

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Shane and I will split our time so we do actually enjoy some of what our holiday has to offer so it won’t be manic 24/7 but other than this I really don’t know what I can do.  The thought of him crying on the plane for 2 hours is unbearable but he loves planes and watches them all the time,  what if he loves it and just takes it all in.

Am I being selfish? Am I being stupid? what if?  what if?  what if?   arggghhhhhh.

We’ll soon find out and I’m sure the holiday blogs will  be absolutely crackers.

If you have any hints and tips for me please let me know.  The fear is real :).