When I got home tonight after our post school jaunt about it was 8.15. I was cold, wet and tired. The tiny blister on my little toe is now a hole that hurts.  I had with me one my little pony Easter egg and a sly fry’s peppermint cream. As I came through the door I was greeted you the dove from above “Mam what’s for my tea!”.  I nearly dumped Reilly in the kitchen and considered bolting back out the front door and hiding in the nature reserve across the road. Nearly.

Tonight we went to the park unfortunately tonight none of the child things were of any interest Reilly wanted to be on the field where the junior footballers were trying, in their clubhouse and more alarmingly in their cars. Looking in the windows and trying the handles like a lifelong twoc-er. So I escorted him out under duress. 

This happened next I only filmed a tiny snippet for safety reasons.

Back up on his feet he ran straight back into the park picked up a handful of gravel and ran, i ran after him muttering FFS while trying to stay alive from exertion.  Only one thing for this scenario and that’s the Piggyback, as long as I have the strength I can get him from A to B with no escape. Bit like Bran and Hodor we headed out the park to McDs which isn’t that far but with Brandon your back and your ‘big coat’ while it’s pissing down its zero fun.  Got there wouldn’t go in. More kicking off crying etc so I thought I’ll buy him a kinder egg from the garage. At this point I’m dying for a wee and have a trapped wind pain in my bum, wouldn’t go in and I can’t use the toilet because the door is too far away from the toilet to keep shut with your foot.  He won’t do McDs toilet neither because he doesn’t like the sounds.

Willow Farm it is because I cannot carry him another inch and he collapses in a heap and refuses to walk in any other direction.  I never dreamed one of children could match me on stubbornness but this kid is a master.  I plodge along praying my bladder will hold out. I buy one child’s carvery (no waiting) and one drink and sit like an drowned rat while Reilly jumps up and down on the kids chairs watching Finding Nemo.  We head to the carvery where the lovely young man says come on lad tell me yourself what you would like, I do my usual hah hah hah he’ll have Turkey but he asks Reilly again to which I say he can’t tell you he’s non verbal autistic.  Honestly the lad was mortified and apologised profusely to which I replied don’t be sorry it’s ok it really is and meant it.  He asked tons of questions about how we communicate etc which is great. 

It’s now starting to get dark, I have no phone (still) so I message shane on the iPad but it hasn’t SIM card in it after Reillygate £200 bill and it’s not connecting to the pathetic Cloud. My messages delivered after I got home.


So we are off, my blisters popped and I still haven’t had a wee. Reilly is pointing at my shoulders to get on but I just can’t so make a running game to keep him moving forward.  Straight home nayyyy Christine we are going to the garage for a bastard kinder egg at this point I would have bought the ten pound egg to get home, he settled for The My Little Pony £5 waste of money egg and I’m appalled at how quick I crumbled tonight. The walk home I can’t quite decide what fettle I’m in on one hand it’s nearly bed time on the other I’m sick as a chip and hungry. 

25 minutes later ….

Opens door “Mam what’s for my tea?” Wee before tea I say.  With coat still on gets pans out and starts tea I can’t eat it as it’s got dairy in and can’t be bothered to do anything else and put myself 2 slices of toast in and make a cup of tea. Put my fave Morello cherry jam on it and dish up the pasta while doing this Reilly puts both slices of toast face down on the kitchen floor and stands on them still in his shoes and tips my tea down the sink,he takes his new purple my little pony out the egg brushes its hair once and throws that in the sink too and I have to just stop and breathe. 

Some days are like this, most days in fact are like this. It’s not all Jet2 and cute photos.  I’ve sacked off the toast and in bed with a cup of tea and my sly Frys peppermint cream.  Pray for a full nights sleep.

Reilly 5 Christine Nil.